Loneliness or Solitude

Its about March,2020. There was our physical exam at 7:30 AM in the morning. As I am an early bird,I reached to the college at 7:05 AM. There were no students and just the security staff and sweepers.I sat down on the stairs and was waiting for examiner to come. Also, none of my contemporary was there. After few minutes one friend of my close friend came there. Initially she looked at me and then she

started scrolling in her mobile. We were not friends or we never had any talks so that we could talk.Then she came to me started talking,” kadhi aalis, koni aal nahi ajun” and some random things. I wondered why she is talking to me as we have faced so many Ɵmes each other in college but never talked and why today? 

I got the answer when her friends came.

People or I should say young adults are scared of being alone. I am not just saying this randomly. I have witnessed the incidents. They always want to be with someone, their so-called best friends, groups, and their people. They are totally dependent upon their friends like whether to come to college, which subject to be chosen, what to eat, which lectures to  attend, and so many silly things. I don’t understand sometimes that how one can give so much decision power of his/her to such

factors. Why you cannot take your decision on your own. If the person wants to grow and develop then wasting time on such things and giving up owns decision power, is it affordable? At least I don’t think so. You may judge me but I am not like this.

Let us come to that girl. What I realized from the scene.

I think, her intention was not wrong to just use me (rather my time) for the time till her friends come.The reason why she told me that day because such people are scared of being alone (And please it’s not about networking, if she wanted such then she could have been before this). They just cannot be without their friends, groups. She directly did not come to me; she scrolled her mobile for a minute.And then she came to me and started talking. What that means is first she tried to be alone but she

could not.

Let us analyze another one.

The two girls became closed one of each other. I was observing the things as a keen learner of

human relations. At initial days they were not likely to talk more. But as days passed, they became closed. Why? Cause at their subconscious level they needed someone. Then from their shopping malls, grocery mart, their Sunday meals, and most other things were just same. One hilarious thing was, we were travelling together with PMPML just 5-6 km from our location. They got a seat at

different places and the sadness of not getting a seat together was on their face. As the seat beside got free; within a fraction of second she invited her closed one. I was laughing under mask, like are you a couple. Why, it is just 2-3 km left and still you want to sit together. The reason is not about she’s her close friend but she wants to be with someone she knows. She cannot be alone.

Let us third one. I think you have started assuming about me that which kind of person am I? Haha…

Our college arranged an Industrial Visit to Chiplun, in Ratnagiri. Literally except me no one was there came alone. Everyone was there just because their friend was there. Rather I saw these people while registering for visit, they were like,” if you are coming then only, I’ll.” Now my point arises “why not just you” cause again they scared of being alone. Deciding on the basis of other’s decision, opinions,

views make you disabled mentally. And the thing which is to be emphasized is- that not was not picnic, that was “An Industrial Visit”. To learn about a company, an industry by visitng and observing things in real, to take pracƟ cal knowledge about whatever you’re studying, which would help ultimately YOU!

And You still need others with you.

I am not a person with a lot of experience but whatever I have experience till the date I should give FREE suggestion on that basis that-

 

NOTHING is permanent!

DECISIONs are to be taken by considering your dreams, growth, career, and parents!

(You can see the order of consideraƟ on it is not career or parents, it is your dreams and growth first.)

16 TO 30 is the age in which one may learn, grow, develop. As more you give for yourself in these years, for sure you will get the higher rate of return (ROR) on that and no other investment can match such ROR.

 Now we are at the end on this! You may have question like what about happiness, friendships, enjoyment? I would like to emphasize again on that I never said that live alone, or do not indulge in any relation!

It’s just- ‘Your decision should be for YOU and YOU only and DON’T be scared of being alone, LEARN to enjoy and UTILISE the solitude, My friend!’